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1.04.2012

Our 2012 Predictions!

Hello folks! We're heading into a new year, and you know what that means. It means failed resolutions and predictions for the year that will likely be wrong. So, we decided to get in on that too and offer up our predictions for 2012.

Jordan's Predictions:
  1. The Saints will win the Super Bowl - The Saints will be able to shred the Packers' poor pass defense, and the AFC is just plain terrible this year.
  2. Obama will win the 2012 Presidential Election - The Republican field looks like the cast of a reality TV show.
  3. "Ides of March" wins best picture at the Oscars - Not because I think it was the best picture personally, just because.
  4. The Higgs Boson will be experimentally confirmed - Which will simply be awesome
  5. Celebrity Death Pool Pick - Mickey Rourke

Dean's Predictions:
  1. Stephen Stasburg will win NL Cy Young - A few big league games under his belt, and a great off-season of workouts will help him live up to his original hype.
  2. John Boehner will lose the Speakership - Far right usurpers will call for yet another new direction.
  3. Sketch comedy will make a resurgence - SNL will of course cover the election, but networks will use the 2012 races to try primetime variety shows again.
  4. iPod/device chargers in clothing will be big - We’re seeing a few companies dip their toes in now, but it’ll be a trend by the end of the year.
  5. Breakout Celebrity of the Year - Jason Sudekis
Ed's Predictions:
  1. U.S. will be first in Medal count for the 2012 summer Olympics - Look, anyone who watches the Summer Olympics knows that the U.S. is almost always the favorite (took first in 2000 and 2004). This time the games aren't being held in China, so I think they will return to the top.
  2. Ron Paul will run as an independent candidate for the Libertarian party in the 2012 presidential election - He's been trying this whole republican thing for a while now and it's not working out. Plus, he doesn't have that much time left.
  3. "The Help" will beat out critical darlings (i.e., The Artist, Shame, We need to talk about Kevin) for Best Picture - In another shameless attempt to get more viewers (think Crash vs. Brokeback Mountain), the academy will choose the movie most people saw over a silent film, an NC-17 movie about a sex addict, and a movie about a family dealing with a psychopathic son for the Oscar. 
  4. Scientists will find evidence of life on other planets - It will likely be single-celled and not look much like life here on the old third rock from the sun.
  5. Celebrity of the year: Leonardo DiCaprio. Titanic is being re-released in 3D and DiCaprio is starring in two potentially huge films: Baz Luhrmann's adaptation of the Great Gatsby and Quentin Tarantino's new Cold War era film Django Unchained. 

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6 comments:

  1. How is Ron Paul going to run as an independant and as the Libertarian Party candidate?

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  2. Forgive me. I meant "third party" identifying as a libertarian.

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  3. If the Americans elect thing actually works out I could see Paul snagging that ticket.

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  4. Yeah, I think he'll do that. I don't think he'd run affiliated with the Libertarian Party.

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  5. 1. Packers will win the Superbowl despite their poor pass defense. In the NFC playoffs, said pass defense will be aided significantly by cold weather hampering the pass offenses of the opposing teams.

    2. There will be a third party candidate for president (Probably Ron Paul) that will get the largest percentage of the vote for a third party candiate since Teddy R ran as the candidate for the Bull Moose Party in 1912. I really hope he re-starts the Bull Moose Party for this purpose.

    3. Arrested Development will not make new episodes or a movie.

    4. Breakout star of the year will be the baby from Full House's little sister.

    5. Robot apocalypse (this will be unrelated to any of that Mayan shit)

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  6. I'm giving myself a halfsie on my football pick. While the Saints can no longer win the Super bowl, I did accurately predict that the Packers shitty pass defense would lose it for them.

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